Popcorn with Dynamite

Cowboys and Aliens... And some Indians...

It had such potential. James Bond... Indiana Jones... Cowboys... Aliens... Olivia Wilde! Unfortunately there wasn't enough action to make up for the mostly unoriginal and predictable script, and the script didn't require enough thought to make up for the less than exciting action. And there wasn't enough Olivia Wilde to make up for either of those.

Horribly Horrible Bosses

It had such potential. It had Teen Wolf Too's Jason Bateman. Jennifer Aniston wasn't horrible in Just Go With It. Jason Sudeikis and Kevin Spacey. The plot is relatable. Who hasn't wanted to kill their boss, but then someone's 12 year old brother got ahold of the script and let their little sister do Colin Farrell's makeup. Charlie Day's whiney voice becomes unbearably whiney as he spends the whole movie whining that Jennifer Aniston is trying to molest him.

Faster.. Not so fast...

The Rock is the star of Faster, out to avenge the death of his brother, but receives the least character development. Sure, it's an action movie, but he receives so little development, you are left not knowing whether you're supposed to like him or not. Fresh out of jail, he's on a mission to kill everyone responsible for his brother's death. Turns out his brother was part of a bank robbing gang that got double crossed.

I just want to be friends, Beth Cooper...

Maybe Chris Columbus and George Lucas should take a long vacation together, so they'll stop making movies. The valedictorian of the high school realizes his graduation speech will be the last time he'll have the chance to say anything to Beth Cooper before their ten year reunion, so he goes for it. It's all down hill from there. There's no real character development throughout the movie.

The Other Mall Cop Movie

They tell you not to call it the "other mall cop movie," but that's what it is... if Paul Blart was allowed to swear. Mall cop with dreams of becoming a real cop? Check. Mall cop with crush on a mall worker? Check. Someone robbing the mall? Check.

Fast & Furious, without the The

Pulling in the highest April opening for a movie ever, "Fast & Furious" drove in the best 4th installment of a movie since "Rocky IV." Okay, so the competition for that prize is "Star Wars Epsiode I" and "Indiana Jones 4," but neither of those have Jordana Brewster. If you liked the original, then you'll like the fourth. If not, then probably not so much. The four core cast members return with *SPOILER ALERT* Michelle Rodriguez making an early exit.

"Miss March," tasty!

Maybe "Fired Up!" had just set my expectations so low, but "Miss March" was actually pretty enjoyable. The story revolves around Eugene, who ends up in a coma just moments before he is going to lose his virginity on prom night. Fast forward four years and Eugene wakes up (using a very unique technique, which resurfaces during the end credits... so, stick around) to find his girlfriend has become Playboy's Miss March.

"Fired Up!" - Burn the Film!

If you are looking for a comedy, keep looking. My first hint should have come when I went to see the film opening day and there was only one other person in the theater. With a rating of PG-13, you don't even get the gratuitous nudity you'd expect from a film like this. Not to say there aren't plenty of beautiful women bouncing around cheer camp.

Burn the International's passport!

"The International" sports a plot to thin to be a drama and not enough action to be an action movie, which may be why it couldn't even beat out "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" (in it's 4th week... See, I told you it was funny). Clive Owen plays an Interpol agent bent on bringing down the IBBC, an international bank determined to control the world's debt. Their plan? Buy missiles and guidance systems and resell them. Why?

Fanboys

Kristen Bell dressed as Princess Leia in the slave outfit? If you need more, there's also the real Princess Leia, Seth Rogan as a pimp, William Shatner as himself, Jay and Silent Bob, Ethan Suplee, and Billy Dee Williams!